Dangers of Being a Geek

I have been a geek for a long time and it's not easy, although it is almost always fun. Now you have to understand that while most people immediately think of Geek as a nerd that dresses in a Storm Trooper costume and goes to some sort of geek conventions. This is not the definition of a geek but merely an example. A geek is some one who takes any thing to an extreme. Yes you too might be a geek. Guys who go to weekly meeting of fantasy foot ball wearing some sort of uniform are geeks. People who go to kiss concerts dressed as members of kiss are geeks. And anytime you step outside of the norm you run a risk of being ostracized. But sometimes there are hidden dangers that people don't realize.

Like the Batman urban myth.

I first heard this story when my friends mother broke out laughing while reading a dear Abby column. As the story goes a guy coming home heard a woman calling out "help! Help!" The guy knocked on the door and asked if everything was ok and the woman said she could not open the door. because she was tied up. After breaking down the door the guy finds the young lady is tied to her bed dressed as a sexy robin while her husband dressed as batman is unconscious on the floor. Apparently The couple were enjoying some sex games where the husband was supposed to jump from the dresser onto the bed but hit the ceiling and knocked himself out leaving the wife tied up.

What makes this so funny to me is the whole conversation that brought this up.

"Honey tonight could we try something a little freaky?"

"Like what?"

"Well I was thinking we could dress up in costume tonight."

"Do you want e to be a hooker again?"

"Well I was thinking we could do something from comics"

"Ohh can I be cat woman or maybe Wonder woman."

"Well I was thinking more boy wonderish."

I wish this was the only crazy sex story I have ever heard involving geeks but well there is the whole world of Furries and Plushies. If you don't know what this is these are people who dress up as animals for fun. Now not all of them engage in kinky sex acts but some really get off on the idea pf doing it as an animal. As such some of the costumes can be really intricate. Well as the rumor goes one guy who was rather large and just getting into it had a really intricate panda suit made. While engaging in some carnal delights he didn't take into account how hot the costume got. Apparently not wanting to stop and get a glass of water he just kept going until he passed out.

Being a geek can be hard.

Friends Comics & Movies

This weekend I got to hang with some old HS friends and make some new ones. I'm constantly amazed at how lucky I have been in my friends. Growing up I didn't have a lot of friends and I guess you can say they were more situational friends than anything. Either we were in the same school or on the same baseball team but a lot of those friendships lasted until school was out or the season was up. Part of it was my own fault I'm clumsy, I stutter, I'm fat or at least that is what I thought. Why would anyone want to be friends with me?

Than the craziest thing ever happened I was kicked out of Catholic school and sent to Public school. Now I had been fights all the time in Catholic school and with all the horror stories my mom told me about public school I walked in there with a jail hose mentality. I was not going to be anyone's bitch. I created this shell that I wouldn't let anyone get past. I hardly spoke to anyone and after a while it affected me. I really didn't care about other people. If I did that would just give them a chance to hurt me.

Than I met this guy who really hadn't said much to me other than "hey, what's up" till he saw me pull out my comics. Now I have always loved comics since I first discovered them and when this kid asked to read mine I said sure. After that we always talked about the newest comics, eventually he invited me to go check out a movie with him and a couple of his friends. I like the guy and He got me with my second love movies, so I figure why not. I'll meet some of his friends maybe they will all be cool. Yeah they were real cool they stood me up. I was so heated when I was leaving I was just going to a pizza place I know and eat angry.

As I am walking out the theater I see them coming in... Apparently they got lost and had a mini adventure. I end up sneaking into the theater they are going into and check out another movie. After the movie as we are all walking home they tell me the story of how they got lost and ended up cutting through a cemetery, at night, in the Bronx. I was able to forgive them and from there Grew a few friendships and one person who I consider a brother.

Since than I have been lucky to meet some amazing people who I have been able to consider true friends. People who I have laughed with, Cried with, Even hated at times but when it's all said and done a friend is someone who is not there just when things are good but when the chips are down and I know I could call on any of them and they would do everything they can to help me.

I have a friend who is an artist who helped me go for my dream as a writer.

I have a friend who I don't get to see as often as I would like but to this day I love her as much as when we used to hang out every day playing cards and when we see each other it's like no time has past.

I have a friend that no matter how goofy I get I know he will not only accept me but join in on any crazy Idea I have.

I have a friend who has had more than 3 peoples share of problems but each time life tries to knock her down she picks her self up and just says "Is that all you got?"

I have a friend who whenever we talk I have to set an alarm cause we always loose track... I swear we were only talking 15 minutes not 4 hours.

I have 2 friends who are a couple who have always showed me nothing but love and have welcomed me into there home many times.

I have a friend who is so protective of me that she sometimes treats me like I'm her kid...Even though I'm older.

As I look at this list I know there are people who I have left out for one reason or another but I'm lucky to have made the friends I have and my life is better because of them.


What is a friend for? Through rich and through poor
Kinda like a marriage balanced on a different floor
A friend could tell you things that he wouldn't tell another
So in essence, a friend could be considered a brother

What Love is

Ok just caught a movie on my Netflix called What Love is Starring Cuba Gooding, Mathew Lilliard Sean Astin.  The actual story of the movie is simple;  Cuba Gets to his home on Valentines night and discovers his girlfriend of 3 years has just left him.  What follows is various rants on men, women, relationships and oral sex (One of the funniest scenes in the movie.)  One of the best rants is not a real rant, in between Cuba Gooding Jr & Mathew Lillard screaming there heads of Sean Astin calmly tells about the 11th Man theory.  The theory goes as follows: 

"say there is a woman in a room with 10 men, and all 10 men are telling her how beautiful she is, and how amazing she is and they are lighting her cigarette and buying her drinks and just treating her like gold. Then all of a sudden in walks the 11th man, he takes one look at her and says "hey how ya doin'", turns his back on her and starts talking to his boys, THAT'S the guy she wants to be with, the 11th man, not any of the 10 men who were treating her well all night, but the one guy that couldn't care less, why? Because for some reason women don't want nice, they don't want real, they don't want to be treated well, I mean not at first and sometimes not ever, and I think that's crazy and I refuse to play that game .... get a girl by pretending that I don't like her, I wanna be with a woman who's real, who digs it when I'm nice to her, who doesn't see that as weakness or take me for granted when I tell her that I think she is more amazing than anything else in the entire world, but unfortunately most women aren't like that, they say they are, deep down inside they want to be, but ... they're not"

Now this theory strikes a chord with me cause as I get older I'm seeing the results of dating that 11th guy.  A couple of Google searches indicate that the current divorce rate is about 43%.  Many of my own friends are on there 2nd marriage or have long term relationships that can only be described as shit awful.  And I don't know if the 11th man theory is the actual problem but how can a solution be found if the problem can't be identified. 

I've always liked puzzles because no matter how hard the puzzle was you knew there was a solution.  It could take me hours to figure it out but even if I couldn't figure it out I knew there was an answer, but not with people.  You can not look on a woman's ass for a cheat code that gets you to the boss level.  Trust me I've looked. 

Near as I can see it there is one big problem between men and women... No one knows what's real.  We read these books, watch these TV shows and see these movies and think that is how life will turn out.  The couple getting together in the third act after a ton of obstacles makes for a great story but life doesn't have to be that hard. 

Guys a woman will know within the first 5 minutes if she wants to sleep with you and nothing you will say or do will change that.  Now like all rules there are exceptions but it will be a lot easier once you find out she is not interested in you if you assume the most you can ever be is friends.  

Women a guy knows with in the first 5 seconds if he wants to sleep with you.  The next 4 minutes and 55 seconds is spent figuring out if he wants more than that.  A man's desire for sex is practically constant and when he sees a woman he know if he wants to have sex with her.  But wanting to have sex and wanting a relationship is not the same thing.  If he says before hand he is not looking for a relationship he just wants to hook up.  Don't be upset when he hooks up with someone else.  The whole men don't really know what they want logic is bull shit.  We may not know what's best for us but we know what we want.   

So it seems that the very act of dating is screwed up to begin with and I'm not sure what the problem is but I have a theory and it's a pretty easy theory. Most guys are simple creatures. We don't think things through. We'll take on projects that are beyond our scope cause we don't know better. It's like a guy saying I'm going into the woods to go camping and live of the land and all I'm bringing is a spoon. No I don't really have any wilderness survival skills but I was a boy scout for 6 weeks I'll be fine.

Women over think things they look at a situation and come up with a Million possibilities of what may happen and based on that they formulate there course of action trying to take in account all possibilities. That's like Packing for a trip with out knowing when or where you're going or how long you will be gone. It's not mentally healthy.

The very act of dating is a moron and a nut job trying to find each other... It sometimes seems impossible but it can't be because I know couples have made it work.

Than again what do I know?


Below is the actual scene from the movie.

The colors

    So yesterday a number of women posted a color on there status.  From what I figured it is the color of the bra they were wearing.  While women's underwear is something I enjoy in between my dirty thoughts was a rather profound one. 
    The internet is amazing! Most of us take for granted what we can do with the internet.  Lets ignore the 90% that is porn based (This is temporary guys, you can go back to searching for porn after you read this... I know I will after I get done writing about it.)  In the course of one day I had people from White Plains the Bronx and Queens posting there colors within 3 hours of each other.  By the 4th hour I read comments from people who lived in Seatle, Oklahoma & North Carolina. 
    From what I understand this is to support Breast Cancer Awareness so I can see why so many women would be willing to do it.  But it's the fact that they were able to do it that amazes me.  20 Years ago they would have had to spend millions of dollars to get the same word of mouth that they got in one day. Just because an organization is charitable does not mean they don't have to pay for Advertising.  Advertising being what it is I think this was a briliant idea and I hope that it helps with donations and awareness. 
    I think the fact that this phenomenon occurred and got me to not only look it up but read up a little on breast cancer is proof that the campaign is working.   Not only are the women putting up the colors but men are trying to figure out what it is about, and while I have read some message boards with guys talking about how they should expand on the ideas by showing women in there bras the joking has been good natured and none of the men have been disrespectful. (I'm sure if I searched hard i would find some insensitive dicks who would piss me off, but why bother wasting my time doing that?) 
    So now you have men & women who are aware of a horrible disease but in a way that does not talk down or depress people.  I mean cancer is serious but people's spirits need to be raised when you are sick.  I truly believe that a person's frame of mind helps them stay healthier and laughter is the best medicine.   This was a fun and effective way to raise awareness. 
    You may now return to your normal Porn searching habits, I know I am.

Below is a link to National Breast Cancer Foundation.
http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/

Zombieland Review

While I am not a big fan of horror movies I really enjoyed Zombieland.   The movie surrounds the adventures of a young man nicknamed Columbus (played by Jessie Eisenberg) who has developed rules for surviving Zombieland.  As the movie unfolds you realize that this is a different type of zombie movie.  The first thing you notice is the cinematography, as Columbus describes his rules for survival various flashbacks and the use of animated text you are warned that this movie is just going to be a roller coaster of fun and destruction.

The next thing you notice is that Columbus is not your typical hero, his rules are just structured cowardice so that he can survive.  While he is alive, he is also very alone and not only has no one after the virus hit but also had no one before the virus hit.

Most importantly this movie is just fun.  Its not a political commentary.  It's not a reimagining of a classic.  It's a thin story more suited for a video game that relies on it's humor and horror to entertain and it does so with out apology.

With scenes of little Zombie girls attacking a soccer Mom or a zombie stripper chasing after patrons you can't help to have the bar set high for the movies silliness factor and this movie does not disappoint.
Action scenes that are impossibly over the top and a kick ass red neck stereo types (Woody Harrelson) are just a small part of what makes Zombieland so great.  The truth is that this movie takes it's cue from one of my all time favorite TV shows Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  There's comedy, there's action and there's even a sprinkle of drama that you don't expect but is actually quite touching.  It combines these elements in an unexpected way but entertains none the less

All in all I would say this movie was a pleasant surprise and I highly recommend it. I give it 4 stars out of 5.